Retail Lepers or Cash Handling 101

This is a pet peeve of mine. I hold a personal vendetta against those who have no cash handling skills.  I'm not talking about the 7-year-old who comes up with his mother and doesn't quite understand the concept of money so I end up with miss-matched horribly askew pile of bills and change that has just been retched from the sweaty pocket of this little tyke, not even counted, and thrust upon my counter in a manner so haphazard it would make Dale Carnegie weep.  I try to take the opportunity there and teach the child how to count the money and why it's important  so on and so forth because it's obvious the parent doesn't (but that's another story for another day).

In a land where Cash is now King and Plastic is a Sin, I speak of the adults who pull wads of cash out of their purses or wallets or pockets or socks (yes I've had it happen and it's icky.)  and in such a haphazard manner make piles with their money on their side of the counter while counting out loud and examining closely the denomination of each bill to ensure they do not under any circumstances had over one bill more than absolutely necessary.  After they have scrutinized and agonized over their selection of bills they look up at my outstretched hand as I have waited very patiently for them to finish this unfamiliar ritual and shove the pile of bills ever so slightly in my direction as an indication that I am now allowed to touch, organize, recount then finally take into possession, their most precious commodity.   I look at the pile and think that this cannot be right.  I had my hand out for them to put money into.  I politely waited for it.  If I did this to their change I would be written up!  So now I stretch my short arms across the counter inevitably spilling any change that they have gathered.  I do this on purpose. It's to get back at them for treating me with such indignity.  I am not the devil here, I did not force the consumer to purchase whatever item they have and yet they treat me and my fellow cashiers as though we are vampires and not the sparkly kind.  

I find it terrifying to not be treated with enough respect to be simply handed money.   I understand that for years and years you simply handed your Plastic over and with a simple swipe the deed was done but this is not necessarily the case anymore.    Cashiers are not slaves to the customer, there is just absolutely no reason to be so rude.  But alas, the consumer looks down upon the cashier and treats him or her with all the consideration they would have for a leper.  No, that's a lie, the consumer would have more consideration for the leper, the leper could be saved by Jesus, the cashier cannot.  They do not want to catch whatever disease caused me to become a lowly retail worker in the first place so they refuse to have even the slightest possibility of contact.  I look at them with disdain because they refuse to treat me with what I consider to be a basic respect and decency and they look at me with disdain because I might bring them down to my level, retail.